It is ok if today you only managed to drag yourself into the shower at 11am, slap shampoo onto the top of your head and pray it trickles down to clean the rest, because honestly—picking up the soap and loofa feels like a full-body workout. It is ok if you stepped out, half-damp, threw the towel around your shoulders and thought: Good enough. Nature’s air-dry cycle will do the rest.
It is ok if you opened that bathroom drawer filled with miracle creams and “age-defying” serums you were reckless enough to “pay-just-now” prices for… only to glare at them, mutter unrepeatable words, and slam the drawer shut. ON that note, it is okay if you sometimes catch your reflection and wonder who that woman is. The one with a new landscape of lines around her eyes and a few more on her forehead. The one whose neck seems to have its own plans. SO… for today it is “f*ck you” serums, why bother anyway. Gown back on. Slippers back on. That’s today’s runway look.
And it is ok if, after all that, you manage to make a cup of coffee and sit with it for two whole minutes before someone (or some furry creature) needs you. That’s a victory. A tiny, perfect, steam-filled victory.
It is ok if your “work from home” routine began at 4am because the menopausal brain gremlins wouldn’t let you sleep. And now, by mid-morning, you’re staring blankly at the computer screen wondering if your brain has quietly left the building. Spoiler: it has.
It is ok if the daily chores of a 50+ woman don’t look like much to outsiders—because they don’t see the reality. The constant feeding of creatures- human and beast alike (even the “grown-up” ones, who somehow still wander into the kitchen and ask: “What’s there to eat, Mom?” as if you run a restaurant). The youngest, forever in need of “stuff”—while leaving a tower of dirty dishes in the bedroom like some modern art installation. The feeding of the dogs, cats, birds, and that one goldfish you’re convinced is immortal. The laundry that reproduces overnight and as if that isn’t enough, there’s the a ceramic skyscraper collection waiting for demolition piled in the sink… while the dishwasher stands right there, empty, practically begging to be used. The WhatsApp groups ping 37 times before breakfast, or after 8 at night… all with messages that could’ve been one sentence. And heaven forbid you open the fridge and realize—you’re out of wine.
BUT... here’s the part that makes it all worth it.
It is okay, because in between the chaos, you feel that sloppy kiss from the dog, and for a second, you’re just a person who is loved without question. The cat curls against you, a vibrating little engine of pure contentment, and you are the whole world to this creature. The teen's unexpected hug is a whispered reassurance of “I LOVE YOU MAMMA” that despite all the eye-rolls, you're still their anchor. Your grown child’s call isn’t a chore, but a check-in from a person you helped launch into the world, and then that wonderful granddaughter, the one you adore, runs to you, wraps her arms around your legs, and shouts, “Grandmamma!” like you’re the best surprise of her day. To top it all, when the man who has your heart says, “Darling, you outdid yourself,” it isn't about the dinner—it’s about him seeing you, seeing the effort, and loving the magnificent, messy woman you are.
It is okay, because even in the exhausting, sweaty-hot-flash ridiculousness of it all—those little pockets of joy are the evidence. They are the proof that you’re not just surviving; you’re living. You’ve still got this.
So, to every woman who feels she hasn’t ticked off enough boxes today—remember: a gown, slippers, dry shampoo, and a heart full of love is more than okay. It’s extraordinary.